PLEASE HELP WITH - English translation of the song: How to Move On

Apr 27

4 min read

I am looking for advice and ratings for the most accurate, most meaningful and best translation of the song from Croatian to US-English, which will become the official translation.

I would be grateful for comments, even if it is just a comment, "This is the best version for me" or "This one is not good because it is not written in proper US-English" or "This translation does not make sense". Please only contact me or comment if you live in the US, or if you are completely confident in your excellent command of English and grammar.

Thank you all.

Here is the table of contents, or rather the list and description of the translations.

By clicking on the description you can go directly to the desired version, or you can scroll down to see all versions.

VERSIONS (Kako Dalje - How to Move On)

1. Original Croatian

2. Closest possible direct translation of the poem (without rhyme)

3. Closest possible direct translation of the poem (with rhyme)

4. Attempt at a slightly freer translation (with rhyme)

5. Slightly more creative and freer translation (with rhyme)

6. Completely free translation (with rhyme)

1. Original Croatian

Kako dalje

Nemam više volje

da bih tražio bolje.

Cijeli život plaćam dug,

i vrtim se u krug.

Uvijek iste stvari,

uvijek isti memoari.

Isti putevi, iste staze,

iste noge što me gaze.

Pratim tuđe vrijednosti;

sve same gluposti.

A kako dalje, ni sam ne znam.

A kako sebi, da kažem: "to je kraj".

A kako sebi poraz da priznam...

A kako sebi, poraz da priznam...

2. Closest possible direct translation of the poem (without rhyme)

How to Move On

I don’t have the will

to seek for better.

I’ve paid a debt my whole life,

and I keep going in circles.

Always the same things,

always the same memories.

The same paths, the same trails,

the same feet that tread on me.

I chase what others value;

all the same nonsense.

And how to move forward, I don’t even know how.

And how to tell myself, 'this is the end.'

How do I admit defeat...?

3. Closest possible direct translation of the poem (with rhyme)

How to Move On

I no longer have the will

to seek something better still.

I've been paying a debt my whole life,

and keep going in circles of strife.

Always facing the same old ways,

just living through those endless days.

The same paths, the same trails,

the same shoes that leave their trails.

I follow the values of the crowd;

all that nonsense, loud and proud.

How to move on, I don’t know how,

How to say, "This is the end now."

How to face defeat, I can’t allow.

How to move on, I don’t know how.

4. Attempt at a slightly freer translation (with rhyme)

How to Move On

I no longer have the will to seek,

for better days, when I feel weak.

All my life I’ve paid the cost,

spinning circles, I feel so lost.

Always trapped in the same old role,

caught in stories that take their toll.

Familiar roads I walk each day,

shadows of choices that lead me astray.

Ignoring the wisdom that's hard to find,

adopting values that don’t feel aligned.

How to move on, when the road’s unclear?

How can I say to myself, "It’s the end, my dear"?

How do I face the loss that I fear?

How to move on, when the road’s unclear?

5. Slightly more creative and freer translation (with rhyme)

How to Move On

I no longer have the will to seek what's better,

Better days seem far from shore, like a fading letter.

With every step, I pay my dues,

Spinning in circles, forever I lose.

Every new dawn feels like a déjà vu,

Haunted by stories I thought I knew.

On familiar paths where shadows creep,

Echoes linger, secrets I keep.

Following choices others make,

Blind to the wisdom that I forsake.

How to move on when the memories cling?

How to let go of the past and its sting?

How to embrace what tomorrow may bring?

How to move on when the memories cling?

6. Completely free translation (with rhyme)

How to Move On

My will to seek has faded slow,

For better days I’ll never know.

With each breath, my debt grows vast,

I’m spinning in restless circles, trapped by the past.

Each day unveils a familiar scene,

Replaying moments, if you know what I mean.

On tired paths, I make my stand,

Marching through a life not planned.

In borrowed beliefs, I find my way,

Lost in the noise of what others say.

How to find strength when hope feels so far?

How to accept who we truly are?

How to break free from the burden of my scar

How to move on when hope feels so far?

Song Description: (Scroll down for Voting)

In this song, I explore the deep and often uncomfortable question of how to admit my defeats and failures. I express a profound sense of weariness, feeling trapped in a cycle where life seems to repeat itself endlessly. Each stanza reflects my struggle with the weight of past experiences and the difficulty of moving forward.

As I write, I delve into my frustrations and resignations, grappling with my adherence to societal values that often lead to disillusionment. The recurring themes of monotony and self-doubt resonate throughout, capturing the essence of our human vulnerability.

Ultimately, this song serves as my reflection on personal responsibility—a reminder that the choices I make are mine alone, and acknowledging my mistakes can be one of the hardest truths to face. I recognize my repeated failures and wrestle with the challenge of self-acceptance.

Through this poignant exploration of defeat, I encourage you to confront your own imperfections alongside me. Admitting our shortcomings is a vital part of the human experience, and I hope we can embrace this together.

It would also be beneficial to read both negative and positive comments and critiques to understand where we might have gone wrong in the translation.

Thank you all once again, especially to those for whom American English is their native language and who speak it daily while living in the United States.